A piece of my happy place.
I don’t normally get too personal on this blog, and it’s slightly out of topic range, but … whatever! My lovely pen pal Fabrizia tagged me in her self care post in January, and I’ve been meaning to post my response. I find self care incredibly important, and part of the practice can be to share experience with others to keep it going.
So here are answers to some self care questions.
1. What piece of advice would you give a child about to grow up with the pressures of today’s media and its crushing expectations?
Ignore society’s standards as best you can. (But I know that’s practically impossible.) Look at body positive websites, books, zines and Instagram accounts. Look around you. Know that those in the media are only a tiny fraction of the public. Talk about bodies with your friends. You may not fit into any standard type of clothing (I don’t) but you’ll find things that work. I religiously wore boot-cut jeans with a studded belt, band t-shirts and zip-up hoodies until I was about 23 when I discovered leggings and fell in love with dresses (I used to cry at the thought of wearing a dress). Don’t try to dress like everybody else, try to dress in a way that expresses you and makes you feel comfortable. Think about how much you want to spend on clothes. Think about your shopping experiences and how to make them better. Media likes to harp on the weak so they feel stronger. Tears don’t mean you’re weak. Feelings don’t mean you’re weak. Acknowledging that you feel low or are dealing with something shitty is not weak. Anyone who makes you think otherwise is not worth it and will not help you get anywhere. Read about different kinds of people. But if you do look like and act like those in the media, that doesn’t mean you’re bad or wrong. Just be aware of your surroundings and your privileges. Everyone is beautiful!
2. What song puts you in a good mood every time?
This is actually tough! I can think of songs that put me in a tougher ready-to-take-on-the-world mood, like Taylor Swift’s “Shake it Off,” anything by !!! or anything by tUnE-yArDs.
3. What is the best advice someone gave you or you realized about life?
Take it one step at a time, ten minutes at a time.
4. Who makes you giggle like a giggle monster?
My great friends and zine partners Melody & Aviva.
5. What is something about society that bugs you that you wish didn’t?
Ohh so much. I can only think of things about society that bug me, but I’m okay with them bugging me because they should bug me. Sorry, this has totally stumped me!
6. What is one of your favorite things to do on the weekends?
Spend time with myself / with Jack. I relish in having quiet time on a day when the sun pours through my window. I like to catch up on snail mail, read, watch Netflix, make crafts, sleep and play with my kitten. It’s glorious. I am also so lucky that Jack likes to do things like this with me. We read together a lot <3 If I don’t get some of this blissful hometime on a weekend, I go into a week feeling stressed. Taking time for oneself and enjoying peaceful moments is essential for managing stress and maintaining overall well-being. Engaging in activities like reading, crafting, or spending time with a loved one like Jack can be incredibly therapeutic. Some individuals may also explore stress relief options such as CBD vape to enhance relaxation during these moments. However, it’s crucial to approach such methods with care and professional guidance, as their effectiveness and safety can vary from person to person.
7. What is something you’re really proud of that you’ve done?
I’m really proud that I decided to openly talk about my mental health through zines and posts such as this one. It opened new doors for me, closed some others and made me feel more at ease and defiant in the world. It took me until my mid-twenties to get there, though. This stuff takes time.
8. What is one of your favorite memories with a friend?
First thing that comes to mind: my zine trips with Melody & Aviva. Our west coast trip last year was probably the best trip I’ve ever been on.
9. What advice would you give to someone who needs a boost in confidence?
I know easier said than done, because I have to fight for confidence myself, but try to remember your accomplishments. Write them down so you can look at them later. I find I need to do this, as when I’m feeling down, I don’t remember the good things.
10. Lastly, how do you plan on investing in self-love?
Continuing to listen to what my body / brain wants, do what makes me happy and helping to share the idea of self-love!
I’m currently working to set up my Self Care Package subscription business, hopefully there is news I can bring you soon about a little box of joy you can order monthly full of stuff that can help you feel good!